The Dark Journals: Konk

Author: Red Pickle Duck


Day 1:

Nearly got eaten by constrictus. Don’t remember stealing Bloth’s pudding tin. Missing leg. Oh well, one day of missing my workout video won’t kill my killer physique.

Day 2: Noy Jitat, I was wrong.

Day 4: Primus got away. Konk nearly lost other leg from hungry monkey bird. Good thing Bloth sent monkey bird on mission. He brings some boy back; they argue about something but I wasn’t paying attention, I was trying to steal a table leg so I can walk upright. Bloth throws boy to the constrictus. Boy escapes with both legs. Bloth even madder than about the pudding tin.

Day 8: Boy got treasures. Bloth even madder than when our laundry man dyed his armor pink by accident.

Day 10: Island of the Attani. Stole treasure, almost made off with the king were it not for stupid boy. Hopefully Bloth not so angry.

Day 11: Made it to Pandawa. Ship now has no hull. Also has no anchor, so we made it in record time. Jarvis smells like monkey birds. Stupid boy dies, but Ioz and Tula still after me. Will loose them in Janda Town. Hopefully will loose more than that in Janda Town, new brothel is up I hear.

Day 13: Janda Town. Forgot to buy a new anchor. Made it in record time again. Getting record for being fastest pirate in seas. Bad day though. Zoolie took compass and treasure. New brothel won’t let me in. I am cursed. Wait, maybe this peg-leg is more useful than I thought…

Day 14: Barrels stink.

Bloth feed me to the constrictus, but I, mighty warrior, have defeated it! Stupid boy was in sewers, not dead. He throws mutiny on board. Bloth nearly eaten by dark water. While scuffle was aboard, I took the time to eat other pudding tin.

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